Keeping Yourself Safe from the Down Low
"Keep it on the down low." This innocent slang phrase has changed meanings throughout the years. What was once an expression that meant "keep it a secret" now has an added meaning. Being a man on the "down low" means leading a secret life; sleeping with both men and women but not letting ones wife or steady girlfriend know about it. The secret that these men are keeping can, however, lead to dangerous situations where there is a risk of contracting and spreading sexually transmitted diseases to individuals that these men care about.
Men who live life on the down low come from all ethnicities and social classes. However, statistics show that the majority of men living on the down low are African American. A study of HIV positive men who slept with men but identified themselves as heterosexual showed that 25% were black, 15% were Latino and 6% were white. There are many hypotheses as to why African American men are more prone to living life on the down low. It is shown that white men have a better and more extensive support system when it comes to admitting their bisexuality. For many other cultures, secrecy seems to be the only option when it comes to seeking pleasure from the same sex.
The risks from being on the down low are extreme. Because this secret lifestyle is so taboo, many men feel uncomfortable and rushed while having sex with another man. Anxieties tied to sex lead men to omit the use of condoms. Without a condom, men are at high risk for contracting STDs, especially HIV, if their partner is infected. But men are not the only ones at risk of contracting STDs from the down low. In fact, this secret lifestyle has been cited as the number one reason women are infected with HIV. African American women are three times more at risk for AIDS than Latina women and 18 times more at risk than white women. In addition, 75% of the African American women infected with AIDS contracted it from heterosexual sex.
The down low lifestyle affects not only the man who is seeking pleasure, but all those he comes in sexual contact with. How can society regulate and help prevent this high risk lifestyle from occurring, especially when there are no conspicuous signs that men are living on the down low? Some believe it should start with young people. "We have to talk to young people about sexual orientation before they go off to school." But how young is too young? Other people believe that churches need to open more dialogue about the "down low," but realistically speaking, how many would be able to approach bisexuality with unbiased and compassionate advice? Two reasonably good ways to avoid contracting an STD is through open conversation with your partner and the use of condoms. Condoms serve as a barrier between you and your STDs and should be used regularly, though condoms do not provide perfect protection.
Since
there are no tell tale signs of a man living on the down low, you must
protect yourself. One of your best weapons is the knowledge that
the down low lifestyle exists. Take precautions if you suspect
that your lover is cheating, because like the saying goes, "it's
better to be safe than sorry."
Reference:
James King, Men on the Down Low; author JL king exposes the secret
life that is devastating black women. Jet, 2004.