People of all shapes and sizes can engage in sexual activity and sexual intercourse. However, these differences in body types mean that one person’s favorite sex positions could be less pleasurable or even very uncomfortable for someone else. It is important to find comfortable and pleasurable positions that suit your body type and your abilities. Many overweight individuals that engage in sexual activities may find themselves in positions that are both unfulfilling and uncomfortable.
The following are a few sex positions that promote safe, enjoyable sex while avoiding common problems caused by weight or size. Give them a try!
The missionary position is one of the most basic and easy sexual positions to maintain during intercourse. To achieve this position, one partner lies on their back with their legs bent while the other partner supports themselves on top of them. In this position, the partners are able to face on another. While missionary is not the most exciting position, it does allow for sexual stimulation, intimacy, and comfort. The partner who is laying down can stimulate themselves or their partner with their hands at the same time. This position will be most comfortable for overweight individuals when pillows are added underneath the hips and buttocks of the partner who is laying on their back. The addition of pillows allows for a different angle of penetration and spices up this position while adding support and comfort. G-spot stimulation is increased with use of pillows. Furthermore, the top partner who is generally the penetrating partner, should be sure to put most of their weight through their hands and not lay directly on top of their partner, especially if they are pregnant, in order to protect the baby and not press too heavily down upon their partner.2
Woman Supported on Top
Having one partner on top of another can be somewhat difficult if both partners have larger abdomens. This penetration provides a way around this obstacle. In this position, some pillows can be placed under one partner's hips and buttocks for comfort, while the other partner takes the position on top. The partner on the bottom is generally the penetrator. The top partner places their hands on the ground for support, and leans back against their partner’s bent legs. The partner on top positions their feet down firmly against a surface for stability. The person on the bottom is able to hold onto the top partner’s hips and give any type of manual stimulation that their partner may enjoy during intercourse.2
Legs on Shoulders
One partner, generally the penetrator, while upright on their knees, lifts their partner’s ankles and places them on their shoulders. The upright partner holds on to their partner’s hips or lifts their partner’s butt with their hands. Pillows can be placed under the receiving partner’s back and hips in order to provide extra support and increase comfort. During penetration, partners are able to find ways of stimulating and exploring the other’s body by touching their partner’s legs, arms, breasts, and hips for further stimulation and intimacy.2
If the partners have very large abdomens, this position may be challenging or uncomfortable. To engage in the doggy style position, one partner, generally the penetrator, stands on their knees behind their partner. The partner in front rests on their hands and knees. The back partner penetrates the person who is on all fours from behind. The receiving partner’s hips can be held on to and used as leverage for thrusting. A pillow can be placed under the stomach of the partner in front to allow for support. If both partners are comfortable and willing, this position allows for spanking and hair pulling. If the partner in front is female, their partner can reach around and stimulate their clitoris, vulva, and breasts during penetration. If the partner in front is male, the penis and testicles can also be stimulated.
Side-by-Side Rear Entry
Side-by-side rear entry is one of the easier positions, but it tends to be less stimulating because it limits movement. This position is similar to doggy style in that it involves rear entry. Side-by-side rear entry requires both partners to lie down on their sides. One partner lies in front of the other with their back facing their partner. The partner in the back penetrates the partner in the front. This position is very similar to spooning. Side-by-side rear entry coitus could be difficult if the penetrating partner has a larger stomach that makes the distance between the two partners too large for penetration.1 If this is the case the penetrating partner can lean back so that their hips are closer and at a better angle for penetration. The front partner could also bend forward to achieve the same effect.
The Seated Position
Another great position for overweight people is the seated position, in which the partners use a chair to have intercourse. The penetrating partner will sit normally in the chair. The top partner will face their partner and straddle them. The top partner can put their feet down and use the ground to facilitate movement. Variations can be made with the top partner holding onto the other person and leaning back at various angles to allow for different angles of penetration. Be sure to keep a good hold on your partner and to keep your balance and make sure to use a sturdy chair.3
If coitus proves to be too uncomfortable or not exciting enough, the partners can turn to non-coital forms of stimulation. These sexual practices also tend to be easier than coitus when both partners are overweight. Partners can engage in mutual masturbation, where they manually stimulate each other’s genitals. Over the years, oral sex has become more popular. Fellatio, oral stimulation of the penis, occurs when one person inserts their penis into their partner’s mouth. The partner moves the penis in and out of their mouth, keeping their lips somewhat pursed to provide stimulation. The tongue can also be used to stimulate sensitive portions of the penis such as the corona and the frenulum. Cunnilingus, oral stimulation of the vulva, is another option. The woman’s partner uses their tongue and lips to stimulate her vulva. The tongue is a useful tool in stimulation because it is wet, soft, and extremely mobile. Another oral sex option would be to engage in the “69” position. In this position, both partners perform simultaneous oral sex. In this position, partners can be side-by-side or one partner can be on top as the other lays on their back. Coitus is not necessary for each partner to be fully sexually satisfied.1
Plenty of Fun For All
There are plenty of fun sexually stimulating activities for lovers to enjoy, but the key is to find positions that are exciting and comfortable to engage in. New positions can be exciting for couples; but often, the best sex comes when individuals find what is truly best for them and their bodies. If you are comfortable enough to engage in sexual activity with your partner, you should also be comfortable enough to communicate with your partner about what you enjoy.
Sex can be much more pleasurable and intimate when you learn to love yourself and your body. Self-love does not have one simple definition because there is no endpoint that you have to reach in order to accept yourself. It is important to learn to love yourself as you are in this moment. Know that you do not need validation from anyone but yourself because you are the only person who knows what makes you truly happy. Lastly, surround yourself with people who encourage you to have a positive body image. Friends, family, and partners should support you, encourage you, and bring positivity to your life. Find sexual partners who build you up and encourage you to feel positively about yourself and your body. Self-love is a journey, so do not be ashamed of your past or your struggles. Learning to love your body will help free your mind and allow for positive sexual encounters.
1. LeVay, Simon, Janice I. Baldwin, and John D. Baldwin. Discovering Human Sexuality. Sunderland, MA: Sinauer Associates, 2015. Print.
2. Strovny February 1, 2006, David. "Sexual Positions For Overweight People." AskMen. AskMen, 2006. Web. 04 Oct. 2016.
3. Miller, Korin. "Sex Positions for Every Mood." Cosmopolitan. Hearst Communications, 3 May 2012. Web. 4 Oct. 2016.
Last Updated: 15 October 2016.